Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Days 285 - 307 aka back to the grind

Finally.  I am finally back into the routine.  Because of my toothpick incident and then a sinus infection, I took nearly a month off from Geaux Crossfit.  And I am amazed about how much my eating slipped as each day passed.  If anything, this break has proven that one of the most important pieces to my getting healthy puzzle is Geaux Crossfit.  I cannot do it alone....I was (barely) able to maintain my weight during my hiatus and know that I was able to start back just in time.  My Geaux Crossfit family welcomed me back with open arms and I am so very, very thankful for it.  I am positive this would have been the end of my getting healthy journey without them.

I can barely walk because my body aches from running (over 2 miles today..thanks to the encouragement of my running buddy Candace!) and the WOD on Monday and Wednesday and I am LOVING it! 

hmmm..king cake or chicken kale paleo soup..
(I chose the soup)
But seriously.....I cannot get over how often I think about food.  It is such an addiction and a mental the end of my crossfit break, I was able to rationalize eating some pretty unhealthy food.  I spent so much time thinking that I "deserve" a little treat.  I know that I should be saying I deserve to be healthy and that should be my focus but I am not going to lie and say there is no struggle.  It is an uphill battle. Every single day.  Sometimes I feel like I have to fight my urge to eat unhealthy constantly.  There is always donuts or another goodie in the staff kitchen (not to mention it is King Cake season) brought in by a very generous colleague with the best intentions, or I am running late and want to just go through a drive thru (thank God for Jimmy Johns unwich), or there is no reason.  I just want to eat something delicous and chocolate. 

I am very thankful that Geaux Crossfit is starting a strict 30-day paleo challenge on February 1.  I need it.  I like the idea of committing to 30 days of healthy, clean eating (as opposed to an entire lifetime which can be a bit daunting) and love the support of the many other people doing it.  This is going to be the most strict I have been - we are following the Whole 30 challenge.  Between that and the fact that I am going to run in my first official 5k in 45 days (check out my page), I think I have the motivation I need to lose the 15 pounds I need to reach 100 pounds lost!!  And if that's not enough, I can always count on my fabulous trainer Amber to keep me focused.....

So tomorrow's a new day.  Full of food battles.....and I just have to wake up every day promising myself to fight the good fight and hope I win!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Days 266 - 284 aka outta commission aka time to face the new years resolution

I knew the holidays were going to be hard and I felt like I had really prepared for them mentally.  But my struggle seems to be with the unexpected.  I am not proud of my eating during the last week or fact, I am pretty disgusted.

Poor, sick Abby
I started this holiday break really strongly.  On Friday, December 23 I got up early and, with Kelly Ps support, I ran a 5k..which is about 9 times around the path of the park in my subdivision.  I have such a love/hate relationship with running....I seem to be leaning more towards love lately...

For Christmas Eve and Christmas Day I was pretty proud of my eating.  Aside from some delicious chocolate I stuck to some not so bad eating.  Then my four year old, Abigail got sick - fever, cough, congestion.  It has resulted in about a week of very little sleep for me.  Poor Abigail is up every hour or so and has been suffering from some major nose bleeds.  I am either up with her helping her through a coughing spell or I am up checking to make sure she is okay....It's totally not rational....and a lot of my fear for her health during the night is a result of me watching too much Breaking Bad....I am so afraid Abigail will have a bad reaction to the cough medicine she has been prescribed....

Toothpick Injury
So, I am overtired and already struggling with what I am eating. My fridge is full of not so healthy holiday leftovers that I cannot seem to make myself throw away.... then, when I think that I have it all under control, I get an injury that has kept me from exercising.  Somehow, I managed to get a toothpick stuck in my foot so bad, it required a trip to the emergency room where a doctor had to dig it out with a scalpel and then stitch the whole thing up.  I can't even put a shoe on....

not so Happy New Year!!
From my experience I know that my cleanest eating days are on the same day that I go to Geaux Crossfit.  If I thought my eating was bad before...this lack of sleep, stress from a sick child, and injured foot sent me in a downward spiral that I have not experienced since I began this journey 284 days ago.  Feeling tired and depressed is not the equation to living a healthy lifestyle.

Thank God for my family though.  They know just what I need to get refocused - some competition.  My brother, sister in law, mother, father, husband and I started a weight loss challenge today until Valentines Day....the person that loses the most weight gets some cash and bragging rights....I am such a competitive person.....I will do what it takes to win.  Or, at least, not come in last.  I will stay off my foot like the doctor has recommended until I can exercise again.  But starting today, I will return to the Paleo diet in full force. 

80 pounds lost - finally remembered to share photo!
 2012 did not begin the way I had hoped....there were no fireworks or resolutions.....I rang in the new year with my foot bandaged, holding my sick daughter and feeling sorry for myself.  I think I deserve a do over.  It is time to evaluate my life and choose some resolutions:

1. Eating  goals - I will work to put an end to my emotional eating.  If I am eating something that I am ashamed of or don't want anyone to know about, I will put it down and walk away.  I will eat clean, healthy goals and take the time to make sure I'm prepared.

2. Exercise goals - by the end of this year, I will be able to do 10 girl push ups, run a 5k in less than 30 minutes, do squats in perfect form - back, front, overhead, all of them. Just one pull up would make me so I will continue to go down in bands until I no longer need them.

3. Mental goals - I will try really hard to celebrate my accomplishments and not just focus on the next goal. 

4. Weight loss goals - I will continue to lose weight so that, by the end of 2012 I will have lost a total of 131 pounds....I am at about 80 now so that's a little over 50 to lose in 2012!